I remember her.............my oldest of them all.... her little blonde piggies flying in the wind. Her. Pedaling furiously......no cares no worries.....no friend troubles no boy problems. It seems like so many years ago and yesterday all wrapped up in one. Time flys.... all at its own pace and often stops to tap you on the shoulder to say hello.......... My biggins were teaching the little ones to ride their bikes this week and it was at the least surreal. The big kids with their assurance.......... yelling to the little ones....pedal pedal pedal..............
YOU CAN DO IT........... the encouragement, the bliss, the joy............ the pride.
Unglamorous but perfectly us...........
I see them and watch them change by the day.. by the moment by the hour and I am amazed........they are so crazy, so busy, so much.... and I cant imagine anything different........... Somedays I want to run away, honest I do. But I was meant for this and them for me.
We are all on this wild ride...........yes all of us, even you. This thing we call life.. this big lesson that we must not fail at... this big journey.
I see them all and I am amazed and humbled and in awe.......this is a big job I have been given.......this is a big responsibility that I must uphold.. the whole thing the life, the love, the kids, the husband..........
i must remember to sneak in sleep and good food and laughter...........
the moments they are fleeting......and pass so quickly from our hands... from our minds.. from our memories.........what will next week bring.. next year?
I am trying to get over my crooked smile, my photographed self, my insecurities that I cant hide. I am trying to look past what I see............ I am trying to get over it.......because really in the end.......
i want lots of photos of me with them...........
even if they do include a rather crooked smile.......
